Jason Hairston is an author, inner healing coach, and energy healer that encourages his clients to become students of life as opposed to becoming victims of their circumstances. Jason’s goal is to provide his clients and the general public with spiritual guidance that directs them inward to experience a deeper love so they can live more fulfilling lives. Jason is the author of two books entitled The Desire To Inspire and Relationship Advice For Women and Men: A Deeper Love. Below is my in-depth interview with Jason about relationships, love, and money.
Phillips: What is the purpose of a relationship?
When both partners are learning about themselves and learning about each other, the relationship becomes a learning module and both partners become students of love.
Hairston: A relationship is a learning module and the primary purpose is for both people to grow. In our society, most people don’t enter relationships with an open heart and ready to love because they are afraid of being hurt. But when you are in a situation where you feel safe enough to open your heart, your partner will trigger hidden or deep-seeded emotions within you. Deep connections between you and your partner creates opportunities for intense hidden emotional issues to come to the surface. Since we aren’t educated about relationships in our society, most people aren’t aware of the dynamics of a relationship and their responsibilities in one. When you are in a relationship, it’s your responsibility to go within yourself to identify what emotions/feelings are being triggered and to address those issues. As a couple, the ideal relationship is one where both partners help support each other’s growth through emotional issues that are triggered amongst each other which will allow the couple to grow deeper in love. When both partners are learning about themselves and learning about each other, the relationship becomes a learning module and both partners become students of love.
Phillips: What is a Student of Love?
Hairston: A Student of Love is a person who studies himself or herself to understand their emotions and their emotional triggers. The goal of being a Student of Love is to open your heart so that you can fully love yourself and have the ability to love others. Students of Love aren’t interested in hiding their feelings or emotions from their partners. Students prefer to remain aware of their feelings. Students of Love become consciously aware of what love is triggering within themselves and accept the challenge of growth through love.
Phillips: Besides pleasure, what is the purpose of sex?
Hairston: Sex can have a variety of purposes. Most people have sex with their ego in the driver’s seat and love isn’t the primary purpose. The difficulty with having sex with the ego in the driver’s seat is that the ego has expectations and when those expectations aren’t met, emotional damage is usually created. When people are having sex with each other’s egos, it’s purely a physical experience. But on the other end of the spectrum, if sex is an expression of love, then the purpose of sex can be for healing. When sex is an expression of love, you truly adore the person that you sleep with and you want to share the essence of who you are with him or her. When you step into the act of sex with your heart open, you may receive revelations which lead to healing past emotional issues and the expansion of consciousness. Also, sex can help a couple’s dream became a reality. When two people come together sexually with the intention to share their sexual energy to create or build something in the material world, sex can be a vehicle for the couple to achieve their goal. We’ve been taught that sex is a physical activity but conscious sexuality is really a spiritual act.
Phillips: How do you define a successful relationship?
Some people have financial requirements for their future mate but that has nothing to do with love. The person who can crack your heart open and help you to fully experience love might not meet your income or FICO score requirements.
Hairston: A successful relationship is when two people come together with the intention to help each other, support each other’s growth, to commit to loving each other, being completely honest, and to learn from each other. A relationship is a learning module for growth. We’ve been trained to think that when you meet someone who you have a strong connection with, that a relationship with that person is meant to last forever. My definition of a successful relationship is one that lasts as long as it needs to last for both people to grow. For me, a successful relationship isn’t based on a timeframe; it’s based on growth. Since not all relationships result in marriage, most relationships will end but that doesn’t mean your relationship was a failure. Did you learn something from the relationship? Did you grow as a result of your relationship? If you answered yes to either question, your relationship was a success.
Phillips: What role should money play in relationships?
Hairston: The answer to that question depends on how one defines a relationship. Some people have financial requirements for their future mate but that has nothing to do with love. If your thoughts are that you aren’t going to date someone because they don’t make a certain amount of money, you limit the chances to experience an expansive, meaningful relationship. The person who can crack your heart open and help you to fully experience love might not meet your income or FICO score requirements. I am not suggesting that you get into a relationship with someone who lacks money and ambition because that will probably create an imbalanced relationship. But if someone has a desire and ambition but lacks money, we should be open to relationship possibilities. It is possible for two people to come together with loving energy (whether sexual or not) to manifest their dreams.
The more authentic you are as a person, the less money matters when it comes to relationships. The more authentic you are the more you want to connect with other people who are authentic which has nothing to do with money and everything to do with authenticity. Two authentic people can use a relationship to create and manifest their financial needs.
Phillips: Any closing comments?